Drag Queens: Hot or Not?

I know that I have not written a post in awhile but I'm going to just pretend that no one noticed and move on. I was at a queer bar this past weekend to see some friends perform in a drag queen show. The show was fun and fabulous. I love how drag queens take femininity to the extreme. Hyper feminine is the best way to describe them. They've got the long, hair spray soaked locks (aka wig), the fake french manicured nails, the gobs of makeup topped off by perfectly curled fake eyelashes, and of course the skimpiest of dresses and sky high heels. One actual woman (straight or gay) would never be able to pull off several of those things together let alone all of them.

I began thinking about our fascination with drag queens after one of my friends who is a lesbian said to me this about one of the drag queens at the show, "she's hotter than a lot of women that I've known". Well, my first tidbit of advice to anyone with the urge to blurt out a statement like this is to make sure that your new girlfriend is not sitting anywhere within earshot. My friend's was and didn't seem to appreciate what she thought was a comparison of her hotness to the hotness of the drag queen. Although lesbians are stereotypically a self-deprecating, jealous bunch, I can see how her girlfriend may have taken offense. What was it that my friend seemed to find so hot or beautiful about the drag queen? Her girlfriend had none of the characteristics of the drag queen other than that she leaned more toward the femme side of the scale. Would she think her girlfriend was hotter if she wore fishnets, clear plastic six inch heels, and tons of metallic eyeshadow? I don't really know. What I do know is that society likes hyper femme women. They are seen as the epitome of beauty. Otherwise drag queens wouldn't impersonate them.

I don't think that in order to be feminine or feel feminine that you need to transform yourself with makeup, tight clothes, and long hair. I feel feminine every day without all of those things but I'm sure many ladies and gents (aside from my lovely wife of course) would not say that I'm more beautiful than a drag queen and all the other hyper femme women out there. However, I'm sure if my friend rethought her statement, she would realize that although she thinks the look of a drag queen is beautiful, she probably would never want to date one.

The Family that Shops Together Stays Together

I keep vowing not to be so dramatic but I really can't help it. It's in my genes. I come from a family of histrionics. We are all vying for the Oscar for most dramatic actor. Over the years I've tried to remove myself from the drama as much as possible hence living on the opposite side of the country from my family. However, I'm beginning to think that maybe I'm the drama or cause of it. After all, I just had to be "different". By different, I mean gay. I always have to be the best dressed person in the room even if it means upstaging the guest of honor at a party. And I always know what's best which means I'm always right. Maybe my family isn't that crazy. Maybe I'm the crazy one.

I'll probably never really know the answer to that question, however I do know this. Growing up in an unstable household, and by unstable I mean, divorced parents/step-family situation, clothes were always my savior. And they still are. Some of my favorite memories of my childhood are of my mom, grandma, sister and I going school clothes shopping at our favorite department store, Hess's. Hess's was a local icon of a store in Allentown, PA. It was a special time that us girls shared together, laughing, talking, and bonding over clothes. All the drama was forgotten as we played fashionistas for a day. Even though my grandma has since passed and Hess's closed in 1994, my mom, sister, and I still shop together. It amazes me that whatever craziness is going on in our lives, we're able to put it on hold to enjoy a few hours picking out clothes, shoes, and accessories with one another. That's why clothes have been and still are such a big part of my life. And now that my sister is about to give birth to her first child, I'm hoping for a girl or maybe a little gay boy so that we can continue with our tradition.

Fabulous Flying Friday

So I didn't win the $92 million jackpot. Big surprise, right? I guess I'll just have to keep dreaming. For now, I'm going to enjoy what I've got. I'm about to get on a plane tonight for a trip across the country. I always get somewhat nostalgic right before I'm about to fly. Since I love to catastrophize things, I always think the plane is going to crash every time I fly. So I begin to think about the reality of my own mortality.

You're probably wondering where I'm going with all of this since this is supposed to be a blog about fashion and style. I know I can be morbid at times. I am very comfortable with death since I've worked in hospitals for almost 10 years. Nonetheless, I know that if my plane should crash, I will be remembered by my family and friends for lots of things. What is the one thing that would stand out the most? My great social work skills and all the people I helped? My quirky ways? No, probably not. It will be my fashion sense! My family and friends always come to me for fashion advice. I think they sometimes channel me when they have tough decisions about what to wear. And I love it. The narcissist in me loves the fact that I will be remembered every time they open up their closet doors and can't decide what to wear. So who ever said fashion is is frivilous, superficial, and not important, they are full of it! It is who I am. That being said, I'm sure that the flight will go smoothly and I'll be helping my sister pick out what to wear to her baby shower in no time.

Million Dollar Shopper

Today could be my lucky day. Or it could be like every other day. I'll find out at 8pm tonight when the winner of the CA Mega Million lotto is announced. I'm going to buy a lottery ticket. I never buy lotto tickets but a chance at $92 million is worth my dollar today.

I think the best part about buying a lotto ticket is daydreaming about what you would do with the money. Well, actually the best part would be if you won the money but since the odds of that are like 1 in 175 million, I'll settle for daydreaming. Of course, I would give money to my family. Travel. Buy a house. Then I would shop 'til I dropped for clothes, shoes, and bags. (Don't start getting all judgy, I would give some cash to charities too)

There is the one website that I've been dying to try called Bag, Borrow, or Steal. On this site you can rent designer handbags for a monthly price. This is one of those things that, if I had the money, I would do it. It is like Netflix but instead of movies, it's purses. Even if I had $92 million, I would do this rather than spending a thousand dollars on one bag that I'd use for a month and then want to get rid of for a new one. They carry lots of bags from my two favorite designers, Gucci and Chanel. I found one Gucci bag that I love. The retail price is $1500 but at Bag, Borrow, or Steal, I could rent it for $275/month. Ok, you may be thinking that's still outrageous for a bag. But, that's why I haven't done it yet and am waiting for my millions to indulge.

Fabulous Friday

My wonderful stylish friends are constantly inspiring my fashion sense and blog postings. My partner never ceases to amaze me with the creative outfits she puts together each day. I have several good friends who have imaginative styles. And I find that many of my friends trust my fashion advice. Today I am returning the favor and trusting the advice of my friends and celebrating their fashion forwardness.

One of my good friends recently told me about a brand of flip-flops that she found at our local drug store, Longs, called Okabashi. I decided to check them out for myself at Longs and online. They have several different styles; slides, thongs, and even heels. You've probably seen the cross-strap style before. I picture little old ladies wearing them with socks. However, the slides and thongs are great and appear very comfortable. They come in multiple colors and are quite inexpensive at $13.99/pair. The best part about these flip-flops are that they are American made and environmentally friendly. Each shoe is completely recyclable and when you don't want your shoes anymore, you can send them back to the company to be ground and made into new shoes. Since I usually opt for style over comfort when it comes to shoes, my feet would like to thank my friend for introducing me to this brand that does not compromise style for comfort.

Jean Shopping: Not just for those with good genes

There's just something about jean shopping that is very therapeutic. You're probably thinking I must have had a psychotic break. However, even though I hate trying on millions of pairs of jeans to find the perfect fit, when I do, it's like, Nirvana! It's a total rush when your butt looks great, your muffin top is covered up, and your legs don't look like bowling pins. It is so satisfying to find a pair that fits everywhere. Even when you think you're a size four and then all of a sudden you can't even zip up the four. You have to admit defeat and realize you're a six. It is a very humbling experience, but if you can suck it up and get through it, it's well worth it.

I have said many times before that you need to get real with yourself when you shop. Yes I know some people are calling me certain expletives that start with a B right now as I should not be complaining about wearing a size six. I am not complaining at all. I know that I am very blessed with good genes from my parents. However, no matter what size you are, shopping for jeans could blow your self-esteem. For me, I don't care about the number, I go with what fits best. I used to go with what fits OK and costs the least but that has changed. After a few wears, I hated those jeans and never wanted to wear them again. Total waste of money. Now, I spend the extra money on what fits best because I know that I will wear them often and keep them longer.

That being said, I found a great pair of jeans yesterday at Express. I got a coupon in the mail for $20 off a $60 purchase. After trying on what seemed like hundreds of jeans (thank God the store was empty and the nice sales lady kept bringing me sizes), I found THE pair. They are dark blue, trouser style, with tab front. Since I'm tall, they may be a bit short to wear with heels but they will be perfect for flats. And to top it off, they were $70 and I got them for $50 with my coupon. I think it was a great deal and I will get many wears out of them. If you are in the market for new jeans and you've got the money, shop now. Watch your mail for coupons and then hit the sales.

Fabulous Friday

Spring time is officially here and for me, that means the beginning of softball season. The competitiveness, women in shorts getting dirty and sweaty. It's heaven for any lesbian. That's how my girl won my heart. I used to refer to her among my friends as the "hot shortstop". But now that I am happily married, I'm not looking so much at the other players in our rec softball league. However, I can't help but notice the fashion. You may be thinking, "but you're wearing uniforms." Yes, we're all wearing the same shirts but there are many ways to accessorize to make yourself stand out among the crowd.

First, start with your head. You could go with a cute baseball cap or visor. This is definitely a conversation starter if you're wearing a hat with a team or school logo. Or you could go with the standard lesbian bandanna if you're trying to display that tough girl persona. Or how about the retro sweatband? Another accessory to consider is the sunglasses. You could sport the aviators if you want to look cool and like you're not trying too hard. Bolle or Oakley are good options if you want to let everyone know you're a serious competitor. Don't forget to add a sweatband for your wrist and a pair of softball socks. This will really finish the outfit and help you get to second base with that hot left fielder on your team.